Psychotherapy
by KMG-Prosperity
Summary: Bet you have noticed that alot of the inuyasha & yu yu hakusho
1. Into Sibling Problems

DEMON THERAPY!

Inuyasha and shessomaru:family therapy

H: well now that you both have gotton here we can start the session!

( inu and shessy both sit down)

K: now you two seem to be fighting alot, tell us why?

Inu: well you see I dont know my father, he died.

H: oh, must have been the lack of parental bonds!

Inu: No, I loved my mother very much!

K: ( whispers to Heather loud enough to be heard) clearly in denial.

Inu: AM NOT! ( takes out tetsuiga) TAKE THAT BACK!

K: ( ignores him) what about you shesshomaru, anything?

Shess: I'm just trying to make my brother stronger.

H: (hears Inu mumble something) so thats why! ( whispers to Kristina)

K: oh, well thats not cool...

Shess: ( confused)

H: Shesshomaru, Inuyasha hates you 'cause you get something covering your feet and he does'nt!

Inu: ( crazed look and starts rubbing hands together muttering socks underneth his breath

Shess: ( gets up and strats to leave)

K: WAIT! I need to ask you a question!

Shess: What?

K: why is there a moon on your head and how did it get there?

Shess: ( sits back down) Actually I don't know! I fell asleep one day and it was there!  
personally I think it's trying to take over!

K: Shesshomaru are you okay?

MOON-ON-SHESSOMARUS-HEAD( or now known as M.O.S.H): I WILL TAKE OVER HIS BODY AND USE HIM TO RULE THE WORLD! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

H: um ok, but can I have his tail if he gets killed ordestroyed or something?

K: ( appaled looking) HEATHER?

H: What? The moon thing took him over.

Shess: What just happened?

M.O.S.H: BOW TO ME MORTAL!

Shess: OMG! It's talking!

H: Wow that is so cool!

K: We bettter hurry up our next appointent is cominf in.

H: ( picks up the still mumbiling Inuyasha and yelling Shesshomaru and stuffs them into the closet)  
Well, that takes care of that! NEXT!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
( Inuyasha and yuyuhakusho orany other animes used in this fanfiction do not belong to this crazy person!) 


	2. Mothers, Fathers, and Mircoscope cameras

Ch 2: Mothers, Fathers, and Microscope cameras

Wow I never knew they had such problems... Kristina are you done barring the

closet door " Yep!"

good, here comes our next group.

(Shippo comes in and sits down. Miroku sits down next to him)

H: Now I hear you guys have family problems. Tell us about them.

K: yes please

Shippo: Well, Miroku why don't you start.

Miroku:Ok, you see I don't remember every meeting my mother ( starts to weep )

K:( crying ) That is so sad

H:Yeah, whatever get a new mother

Miroku: ( suddenly happy ) What a great idea ( sees a bunny ) ( picks up bunny ) you'll be my new mother!

K: We better keep track on him ...

H:Right ( places microscope camera on Mirokus forehead, then lets him leave )

K:Now Shippo what is wrong with you?

H: Yeah you always seem so happy. Is something wrong?

Shippo: Yes you see I only knew my father for awhile and I never knew my mother!

K:yes that is a problem

( Darth.Vader.Looking.Person. comes out of the shadows )

D.V.L.P: Shippo ( Darth.Varder.Intake ) I am ( D.V.I. ) your father.

Shippo: ( tilts head cutely ) Really?

D.V.L.P: Yes

Shippo:Whoopie ( jumps into D.V.L.P arms ) ( They both walk out the door )

H: Well that was interesting

K: Yeah lets watch the Miroku com.

H:Ok ( presses red button and huge T.V screen comes out )

( We see Miroku in front of a dollar store with bunny in hand )

Miroku: ( looks child like ) mommy can I buy a piece of candy? ( The bunny wiggles his nose,

bunny-like well duh she

is a bunny ) Wahhh you never let me yet get anything ( mama bunny jumps out of

Mirokus arms and onto the street ) MOMMY! COME BACK WATCH OUT FOR THAT

TRUCK! NOOOOOOO! mommy ...

( Miroku sees the mama bunny, it's okay, but Miroku thinks it is dead )

Miroku: Evil Truck Feel The Wrath Of My Wind Tunnel! (sucks in car with wind

tunnel accidentally sucking in the bunny as well ) Wow ... this place is weird ( he finds himself

on a floating rock in the middle of nowhere when a cow floats by )

( The screen goes fuzzy )

H: Ok ... that was weird

K:Cool! I never knew that was in his wind tunnel

H: I don't think anyone did anyone NEXT! 


	3. Reincarnartion Court

CH 3: Reincarnation Court

Sorry still a little shaken up from that Miroku incident wooo! How about you

Kristina " Ha ha ha "

Shessomaru is in the closet". Yeah um ok ... oh hear comes hear our next

patients.

( Kikyo and Kagome walk into therapy room )

H: Ok what are you two here for

Kikyo: We have a problem only one of us may live

K: Why?

Kikyo: Only one of us may have Inuyasha's heart

Kagome: Kikyo, why won't you leave Inuyasha alone

H:Ok this is getting a little weird

K: Did either if you know of his obsession foe socks

Kikyo: Inuyasha Is Mine ( clearly ignoring people )

Kagome: ( shoots Kikyo and kills her )

H: OMG! Kagome just committed murder

K: No, she committed suicide!

H: Holy Shit she did didn't she

K: You know what this means

H: Kristina press the Blue Button

Kagome: What's going on?

H: You have the right to remain silent ... or ELSE!

K: ( press's the blue button )

( They are now in a Court Room )

Judge: Professor Dumbledore

P.D: Please state your emergency case

H: Ok Kikyo tried Kagome but Kagome killed Kikyo and since they are like the

same person reincarnated, Kristina said it was suicide and I am so confused.

K: What do we do?

P.D: Do you have any witnesses?

Kagome: Hey, don't I have a say in this!

All: NO!

H: Oh, yeah, I have a witness. Kristina the closet please.

K: ( opens closet and pulls out Inuyasha who seems in shock ) Inuyasha Wake Up!

Inuyasha: Did you see that she just ...

H: Inuyasha tell Professor Dumledore what you saw. ( Puts Inuyasha on the witness stand )

Inuyasha: She struck ...then ... professor Dumbledore?

P.D: Yes, what is it?

Inuyasha: Do you like socks?

P.D: Yes, socks are the best!

Inuyasha: Do you want to make a I love Socks Club?

P.D: Ok ( Inuyasha and P.d. walk outdoor to make sock club )

K: Well that could have gone better

H: Yeah, we could have got Kagome killed

Kagome: I can hear you

H: Oh, well I can fix that ( grabs Kagome and stuffs her in a box )

K: ( changes court room back to therapist office )

H: Well that was a snore fest NEXT! 


	4. Kitsune and the big scary thingamabob

Ch 5. Fire & ice ... but mostly Hot air

K: Another day another chipmunk

H: ( puts chibi Kurama away ) you mean therapy session right?

K: How does his hair stay up like that?

H: Who?

K: Hiei!

H: Ohhhh ... who knows

K: On with the session!

( enter Hiei and Yukina )

H: So what is your problem?

K: OMG ITS HIEI! ( fall to floor ... twitching )

Hiei: hn.

Yukina: I don't know that he's my long lost brother ... and he listens to really bad music!

Hiei: There's nothing wrong with Korn!

K: Everything Hiei does is wonderful! ( goes to store and buys everything she sees that's Korn )

H: I like corn ... on the cob ... popcorn... corn balls

Yukina: 11! that's nice...!

Hiei: hn.

K: So, you don't know that he's your brother?

Yukina: Yep

H: But then that means you do know!

K: ( very confused ) yeh ... uh ... what she said ( continues looking at Hiei )

Yukina: ( turns to Hiei ) Your my long lost brother?

Hiei: hn. ( also trying to avoid the Kristina looking shadow following him... )

H: So ... anymore problems you would like to talk about?

Hiei: ( running around room avoiding shadow ) hn?

Yukina: Well, I'm not sure ... Hey! want to dance to the Hamster Song?

Hiei: ( hiding behind chair still avoiding Kristina looking shadow ) hn!

H: OK! ( starts dancing with Yukina )

Hiei: Can Someone Help Me! hn. ( runs into wall ) ( closet opens to reveal Youku Kurama )

Youko: Now I Shall Steal All Your Shiny Things! Bwahahahahahaha!

H: ( starts to follow Youko )

Youko: ( hides behind unconscious Hiei trying to shake off Heather looking shadow )

K: ( holds Hiei's spiky head ) Finally he is mine! Now what to do with him! ( takes out shiny

vanilla ice-cream )

Hiei: ( wakes up suddenly ) SWEETSNOW!MINE! hn.

Youko: Oh! Shiny stuff! ooohhh NO MINE!

( Hiei and Youko Kurama both fight to the death for 'shiny sweet snow stuff ' )

K: ( drools ) ( stops, gets look of horror and looks over to the door and screams ) AAAHHHHHHH! ITS E.T! home-phone!

E.T: phone-home and destroy

H+K: USE YOUR OWN DAMN PHONE AHHHHH!

( Youko and Hiei become friends and run out of the room )

(Yukina becomes injured by the glowing hands of E.T ) ( still dancing )

( K+H wait for next session ) ( I like writing in parenthesis )

K: NEXT! 


	5. Fire & Ice But mostly Hot Air

Ch 5. Fire & ice ... but mostly Hot air

K: Another day another chipmunk

H: ( puts chibi Kurama away ) you mean therapy session right?

K: How does his hair stay up like that?

H: Who?

K: Hiei!

H: Ohhhh ... who knows

K: On with the session!

( enter Hiei and Yukina )

H: So what is your problem?

K: OMG ITS HIEI! ( fall to floor ... twitching )

Hiei: hn.

Yukina: I don't know that he's my long lost brother ... and he listens to really bad music!

Hiei: There's nothing wrong with Korn!

K: Everything Hiei does is wonderful! ( goes to store and buys everything she sees that's Korn )

H: I like corn ... on the cob ... popcorn... corn balls

Yukina: 11! that's nice...!

Hiei: hn.

K: So, you don't know that he's your brother?

Yukina: Yep

H: But then that means you do know!

K: ( very confused ) yeh ... uh ... what she said ( continues looking at Hiei )

Yukina: ( turns to Hiei ) Your my long lost brother?

Hiei: hn. ( also trying to avoid the Kristina looking shadow following him... )

H: So ... anymore problems you would like to talk about?

Hiei: ( running around room avoiding shadow ) hn?

Yukina: Well, I'm not sure ... Hey! want to dance to the Hamster Song?

Hiei: ( hiding behind chair still avoiding Kristina looking shadow ) hn!

H: OK! ( starts dancing with Yukina )

Hiei: Can Someone Help Me! hn. ( runs into wall ) ( closet opens to reveal Youku Kurama )

Youko: Now I Shall Steal All Your Shiny Things! Bwahahahahahaha!

H: ( starts to follow Youko )

Youko: ( hides behind unconscious Hiei trying to shake off Heather looking shadow )

K: ( holds Hiei's spiky head ) Finally he is mine! Now what to do with him! ( takes out shiny

vanilla ice-cream )

Hiei: ( wakes up suddenly ) SWEETSNOW!MINE! hn.

Youko: Oh! Shiny stuff! ooohhh NO MINE!

( Hiei and Youko Kurama both fight to the death for 'shiny sweet snow stuff ' )

K: ( drools ) ( stops, gets look of horror and looks over to the door and screams ) AAAHHHHHHH! ITS E.T! home-phone!

E.T: phone-home and destroy

H+K: USE YOUR OWN DAMN PHONE AHHHHH!

( Youko and Hiei become friends and run out of the room )

(Yukina becomes injured by the glowing hands of E.T ) ( still dancing )

( K+H wait for next session ) ( I like writing in parenthesis )

K: NEXT! 


	6. Why A SCAR WHY?

CH 6. WHY A SCAR ... WHY?

H: Hello welcome back to our therapy sessions!

K: ( crying ) I had him in my grasp, so close, so close

H: Yeah to bad well ... whatever

( enter Lord Voldermort and 2 Death eaters )

H: Cool! Hello dark Lord of Evilness.

Lord V: Why have you called me here I have many evil things to do!

K: Anger issues!

Lord V: WHAT!

H: nothing 11!

K: I need to ask you a few questions, than you can leave. Ok?

Lord V: Fine ... but make it quick

K: ( deep intake of breath ) Why do you want to take over the world? Why are you so ugly?

have you ever had a girlfriend? if so was she ugly too? Why are you called the "Dark

Lord" if your favorite color is green? Why not the green Lord? What was your mom

like? Why did you put a scar in Harry's head? Why not not something more

socially expectable? ( starts panting heavily )

Lord V: II! um ... It fun ... Im not ... yes ... no, and im not ugly either ... the green lord sounds like a plant ... none of

your business ... i don't know ... Happy New Year!

H: Wow, he is clueless. Cool!

K: Look I think I over loaded his small snaky brain.

Lord V: ( skipping through field of flowers singing " Happy! Happy! Happy! " )

H: Hahahahahaha! Cool I know lets talk to his Death Eaters

D.E: ummm ... ok ( sits down and pulls back hoods to revel Mr. Malfoy and Snape )

H: So That's where you were Snapy-poo!

Snape: Not You Anyone But YOU!

K: You know him?

Snape: ( disappears through hole in floor )

H: Yeah. I was in his class till I dropped out of school. Good times good times ...

( flash-back )

( enter H, Harry, Ron, Draco, and Hermoine )

Harry: I hate Snape. His class is so boring and cold!

Draco: I don't know he is nice to me.

Ron: Slytherin, duh. I hate Snape!

All except Heather : ( nods head in agreement )

All but Heather: What You Like Snape!

H: Yup, I like how he says " Ms. don't mix those ingredients together, Ms.

please return to your seat,

Ms. don't touch me there!"

All: ( back away from Heather )

( end flash-back )

K: Right ... Whatever

H: ( out of daze ) So, Mr. Malfoy how are you?

K: WATCH OUT! ( giant chipmunk drops out of nowhere and eats Mr. Malfoy, than vanishes )

H: DAMN THOSE CHIPMUNKS!

K: NEXT! 


	7. BirdMan the Fourth!

Ch.7 BirdMan! the Fourth

H: Where did Snape go? Oh Snapey poo!

K: please don't do that ... ok?

H: fine .

( Enter Suzaku and his annoying bird, Murg )

Bird: Suzaku! Suzaku! ( in high annoying voice)

Suzaku: Quiet now Murg

Murg: Yes master Suzaku!

H: Ok! Can we talk now?

K: Yes! Shut Up You Annoying Bird!

Murg: Your going to die! Your going to die!

H: How About Not!

K: Now Suzaku, why are you a Saint Beast?

Suzaku: Thats a good question. Murg, Why am I a Saint Beast?

Murg: The all powerful Suzaku cannot answer that!

H: Why Not!

Murg: because he can't

H: why?

Murg: because I said so

H: why?  
Murg: because you need to shut up

H: why? why? why? why? why? why? why?

Murg: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! ( burst into flames)

K: So Suzaku gonna answer my question?

Suzaku: um ... I wanted to be a Saint Beasty, so I am! ( clearly not noticing that Murg is dead)

K: ( whispering to Heather) Hey, wheres Murg?

H: ( eating a chicken wing) I ... ( swallow) don't remember ...

K: Are You Eating Murg!

H: No, KFC. Murgs burnt body is over there ( points to Murgs dead body)

Suzaku: YOU KILLED MURG!

H: yup!

Suzaku: ...

K: Suzaku, are you okay ...?

Suzaku: YEEEEHAW!

H: What are you so happy about!

Suzaku: Finally Free Of That Annoying Bird! YAY!

K: ( holding a nest with three eggs inside) Hey! Look what I found! ( All look at Kristina)

Suzaku: Oh No! ( Eggs start to hatch)

H: aw look! ( out come three Murg looking chicks)

3.M.L.C: You Shall Never Be Rid Of Us Suzaku!  
( They continue to say ' Suzaku' over and over again)

Suzaku: NOOOO! ( runs out of door screaming with 3.M.L.C flying behind him)

3.M.L.C: SUZAKU! SUZAKU!

H: Wow, that was fun and I got something to eat!

K: whatever ... ( In shock)

H: NEXT! 


	8. A Shocking Accusation! part 1

Ch. 8 A Shocking Accusation Part 1.

H: Look what I have ( holds out one of the annoying birds)

K: Get It Away!

H: Why? scared?

K: No ( shifty eyes)

H: Hahaha fine ( puts bird in a small box and then places that in the closet)  
-  
( Enter Kuwabara, Yukina, and Boton)

H: Today we have a new kind of therapy to try out on you guys

All: What is it?

K: Its called shock therapy ... and your not getting away!

( All ran for the exits but Kristina and Heather made chairs come out of nowhere and clamp all in electrocuting chairs ... with Hiei and Kurama stickers)

H: Now lets start with the ugliest person to ever walk the planet, Kuwabara

Kuwabara: That's Not True! ( H presses button to shock Kuwabara)

Kuwabara: AHHHH! ( sizzle) WHAT WAS THAT FOR?

H: TALKING BACK!

K: Yukina

Yukina: ( scared) ...yes...?

K: what does 1 + 1

Yukina: 2

K: Good! Yay Yukina!

K: Now Boton

Boton: ( perky) Yes!

K: ( presses button to zap Boton)

Boton: ( sizzle) why?

K: to perky

H: ( presses button to shock Kuwabara)

K: ( presses button to shock Boton)

H: ( presses button to shock Kuwabaka)

K: ( presses button to shock Boton)

H: ( presses button to shock Kuwabaka)

K: ( presses button to shock fairy girl)

( Boton and Kuwabara both pass out and are sucked into a hole in the floor funded by Karasu)

Yukina: w wwhat are you going to do to me?

H: Nothing

K: Yeah, your cool ( whispers) tell Hiei I said Hi!

Yukina: ( nods head) Oh Ok! Hey, you want to dance the Funky Turkey?

H: You mean the Funky Chicken?

Yukina: ( face turns hard) No the Funky Turkey ...

H: OK!

( Yukina and Heather dance the Funky Turkey gobble gobble)

K: ! NEXT! 


	9. Sweet Snow and Flying Leprechauns

-  
Ch.9 Sweet Snow and Flying Leprechauns

H: Button Button Button ...

K: Whos got the button

H: I don't have the button. Do you have the button?

K: No. Is'nt that a koniky-dink!

( ENTER JIN AND TOUYA)

K: COOL ITS JIN! ( GLOMPS JIN) be my friend!

Jin: eh 'k?

H: ( In irish accent) Kristina ye best be gettin off Jin be fore he throw ye up

in the air all no fun-like.

Touya: ( runs around in circles due to ... shoes)

H: ( trips Touya and puts him a cotton candy machine and turns it on) Round and

round he goes where

he stops I know! Right There! ( stops machine, which has mystrsiously turned

into a icecream truck)

K: ( still glompling Jin) SWEET SNOW!

( Door opens to reveal Hiei will a crazed expersion)

Hiei: SWEET SNOW! WHERE! ( sees Kristina glompling Jin and becomes jealous)

Touya: Free Icecream! FREE!

Hiei: ( forgets whats he is doing and attacks icecream truck) hn.

H: ( waits expectantly) SHINEY STUFF!

( Kurama walks in calmly)

Kurama: Did someone say shiney stuff?

H: ( glomps Kurama ) Welcome!

Jin: ( gets away from Kristina and seeks refuge behind Heather)

H: I Will Save You! ( Heather, Kurama, and Jin mysteriously dissapear through a hole in the floor

funded by Karasu)

( In the hole In Floor )

JIn: What are we doing here? Why are we in hole in floor!

H: Welcome to my secrect club for prople with red hair. It comes every

Wendsday, to bad today is Friday!

( All reapear in therapy room )

( Kristina, Hiei, and Touya are sitting around a bound fire. they are also

singing the infamous sweet snow song)

Oh holy sweet snow

so cold yet so sweet

and snowy!

Oh holy sweet snow

blah blah blahblah

H: ( jumps) Bowa Chica Bowa A Chicka Bowa

All: ( look at Heather like she is crazy)

H: ( ignoring stares) Did Raven get here yet?

R: ( walks into room) I'M HERE!

H: YAY!

H+R: ( sing Snape song around campfire)

Snape's too sexy for his shirt

to sexy for his shirt

so sexy it hurts

he's to sexy for your party

to sexy for your party

blah blah blah blah blah

All: ( fall down anime style)

H: Wow what a fun fun fun day!

R: Yes it was. Good bye Heather!

H: Bye Raven! L.Y.L.A.S. ( Raven leaves )

K: Ok, why did that happen ...

H: I don't know ... AAAHHHH!

Touya: What?

H: look ( shows really large chimpmunk running away with icecream truck)

Hiei: NOOOOO! ... hn

( runs after chimpmunk)

K: Wait! Hiei! ( But he is long gone)

( All of a sudden a plump woman leprecaun comes flying in the room)

P.F.W.L.: Come Jin, time for dinner

Jin: ( bows head) yes mother ( flys off with leprechaun mother)

P.F.W.L.: ( rubs tummy while flying off giggling)

K: Wait! No My Friend Jin!

H: That just leaves us with Touya ... BWAHAHAHAHAHA

K: you thinking what i'm thinking

H: oh yeah

K+H: ICECREAM PARTY!

Touya: Yay!

( All eat one mouthful of icecream before falling into a deep slumber)

H: ( in sleep ) NEXT! 


End file.
